2013 and Starting Fresh

So 2013 is about starting fresh. Billy and I are taking a big step. After almost 10 years of trying for the one thing we really want ( a child) we have decided to go forward with IVF. Last year I was reconfirmed that I have PCOS. We also found out that Billy's count for normal sperm is very low. The fertility doctors said even with our diet changes and weight loss that having a child on our own is less to none for a chance. So here is why we decided to go with IVF. We are thankful that our insurance will cover one round. I pray that it takes. That it will be a healthy full term pregnancy and nothing bad. Because this is basically our only chance.

 Several of our friends have recently had babies or are announcing there pregnancies. I cant help but be sad for myself. Its so hard to be happy for others when I want a child of my own so badly. Its so hard to be in the line of work I am in and get asked weekly how many children I have because I am so good with them. Then to see my clients face when I tell them I have NONE and I have been trying for almost 10 years. I am bitter and hurt and heart broken. I want a child of my own. I see how it hurts Billy. I know how bad he wants a child too. We will be at a store and just look at the baby clothes or toys. We pick out things we love and would put on our kids if we had them. I even will buy my friends kids stuff just to help fill the void. I know its probably not healty for us to live like that but we dont know what else to do.

 So this month we saw our IVF doctor. We dont know whats going to happen as of yet. He is very worried about my weight and having to be put under for the procedure. I assured him I haven't had any issues in the past and I am continuing on my weight loss journey. ( I am currently down 58 lbs since Sept 2012 ). We will know more of what will happen after my cycle fully starts. Which is so much fun since I had to force it with Provera again. I am suppose to call when I have day 1 and then go in on Day 3 for blood work to check my hormone levels. So they can see what meds they need to give me to grow eggs. Billy wont have to do anything again for awhile. Men have the easy part of this process.


 So if you have read this blog PRAY for us. Pray we have a child of our own in 2013. We need every ounce of hope, prayer and guidance possible.

New Camera = New Love ♥

Wow it has been awhile since I posted something on here. I relize I dont shoot for myself anymore. I have been consumed with shooting clients. I need to change that asap. I need to get less busy and relax find the inspiration again.

Yesterday finally happened. I worked so hard for it. I beat the odds and the set back.
I bought my camera ( 5d mark II). It is the most expensive thing I own. ( I didn't even pay that much for my car)

I am so happy I did it though. My business can only get stronger now that I have it. I am not limited in what I can for the most part. Of course with me its a never ending list of camera equipment. I already have my eye on a lens I want. Sigh.
I need to slow down. Christmas is less than 100 days away and I need to shop for hubs. It wouldn't be fair if he doesn't get anything.


Here are some of the very first shots from my new camera. 1am horrible lighting. ISO 3200! Shutter 1/80 and ap 1.8 with my nifty fifty.

Neiman Marcus Cookie

First cookie exchange recipe of the year.

R.I.P, Digger Eugene Fox

Today was a sad hard day. We lost our beloved cat. Hes was only 8 years old ( to young to die). He was the best cat anyone could ever ask for. He was always lovey. He didn't have a mean bone in his body. 4 years ago we adopted Digger off of craigslist. He was rescued from a horrible home. We have had him ever since. He has been like a son to us. Digger favorite things in life were laying on smelly shoes, rolling in catnip, following the laser and playing with his snow man toy. Digger received his name from the foster home. He always loved digging in his litter box. The name fit so well. Digger leaves behind his family. ( Kamieo, Billy, Ellie, Scooter, & Daisy) We all loved playing with him. We will all miss him.

Last night he all of a sudden was not well at all. He just laid around not wanting to eat or drink. We knew it was his time. We slept out in the living room with him to be near him. We talked to him and just kept petting him. He purred until the very end. I woke up to find that he had passed with a smile on his face. I am happy that he went in his home with his family. We had him cremated this morning. That was the hardest thing I have ever done. I feel like I have lost a son. As I write this the tears are falling. I walk around my house and see him everywhere and remember all of the good time with him. Seriously he was the best. I will never get over the lose of him. I am happy that he is in a better place.


We miss you so much Digger. You are our prince, friend, & Son. You will forever be in our family. You have filled our hearts with joy. I am thankful you came into our lives. Rest in peace boy. We Love you from now until forever.

R.I.P. ~ Digger Eugene Fox 2001- Oct. 27,2009 ~

Picture Perfect

Not that long ago I entered in a contest for a free 24x24 wall photo sticker. Well to my suprise I won! I have been very lucky lately when it comes to winning stuff LOL. So of course I need some new photos of Billy and I. Well Jennifer Tibbetts (my friend) Came to the rescue. She is another fab. Local photographer.